where everything kind of sped up and slowed down at the same time. When I take adderall it’s definitely a mixture of those two things.
There’s a scene in some science fiction movie where the world has stood still and nothing is happening. At one point the protagonist sees a helicopter floating in the sky, with the blades barely moving…and with this he realizes that the earth hasn’t slowed or stopped. HE has sped up.
There’s something nice about looking at this picture
It’s good to remind yourself how to be valuable. It definitely doesn’t feel like I did all that today.
But in the five minutes, seriously five minutes I went to look for that photo to post into here, I came across an email from an old friend….and I wrote this response in 5 minutes.
Like I shouldn’t be able to knock that out. But I did. It’s like whatever I choose to focus on I can. And everything else just disappears or melts away. Days like today I’m thankful to be able to use that to my benefit. But there are other days where it’s complete havoc on me. Where whatever I try to latch onto, I can’t. And then I spin, focusing intently on some problem for about 30 seconds, before the next thing wretches me away. It’s mental handcuffs and sometimes I wonder if I’m really hyperactive if it does this kind of number on me.
I’ve been trying to keep up with everything that’s happened over the past few weeks. (It definitely feels like more than I remembered, but that’s nothing new) In my attempt to write everything down, it feels like I’m losing some perspective. “this is what happened” is not the same as “this is how I feel about what happened.”
I think I could keep writing, but I’m not sure about what. That’s mah thought on today though. Crazy busy. But it doesn’t feel like I have a lot to show for it.